Perspective

I ideas of what to write about today, adventures at the DMV with the little one or the weird dreams I had last night (they involved twin babies), but instead I sit here feeling grateful for the life I have with my husband and sweet girl, and ashamed of myself for ever taking what I have for granted. Our pastor's niece, just five years old, died over the weekend after a 10-week battle with brain cancer. As I watched the memorial service online today, I found myself weeping for a family I barely know and for a child I never met. But more than that I wept with the realization of my greatest fear, that of losing someone close to me. This child's family spoke with gratitude to God for allowing them to have her for the last five years. They said something that will stick with me for a long time: She was never theirs. She always belonged to God. If I were really looking at the people in my life--my husband, my daughter--that way, how would my actions be different, knowing that I have been given these people, only for a time, to love, to take care of, to help, to cherish? My world was turned upside down when my daughter came into it, but never have I thought of her that way--not mine, but God's. Not mine. His. I'm looking at her now in a different light, and can only pray that God will help me do my very best to take care of His child, for as long as He has intended.